I was riding down the road this morning and as I often do, I think of you. I wanted so badly to see you and to talk to you. So, I just had this desire to sit and write you a letter.
I can remember the day of your birth so clearly. The day I found out that I was pregnant with you, I fell in love. For 9 months, we prepared for your arrival. We were so excited. Then that day came. Labor and delivery was long. After your birth, I can remember them handing you to me for the first time. You were so beautiful and I was so happy to finally meet you in person. You had a lot of hair and it stood up all over the place. It's funny to think that you were born with so much long hair and then when you got older, you always wanted long hair.
You brought so much pleasure. You were a calm, content baby. I can remember when you were a week old, I cried. And, I did that every week for the longest time as you got older. I wanted to keep you as my baby forever. I dreaded the day that you would grow up and move out. I loved you so much that I wanted you with me forever. I feel the same way about your brothers and sister.
From the time you were about 2 or 3 and started to draw with pencils, we knew you were going to be talented. Even at such a young age, you could draw so well. I look at your art work now and I can remember when a lot of them were drawn. I'm so glad we have those drawings. They are a treasure to us.
I remember when you were in kindergarten. That's usually when kids learn to write. You would bring home your writing papers and your letters were so neat and perfect. I couldn't even write that neatly. I was so impressed by your work.
You were also a good reader and you enjoyed reading. I was always so proud of you for that because reading has never been one of my favorite things to do, especially when I was in school. Whenever we bought books for you, you wanted the hard copy. You thought they looked neater and you wanted to collect them and put them on your book shelf.
You loved to laugh and you loved funny things. One of your favorite shows over the past few years was The Office. You started watching The Office series on Netflix. You started with season 1 and worked your way through all of them. I can remember so many times you sitting at the computer. You had your headphones on and watching your show. Everything would be quiet in the house and all of a sudden you would burst out laughing. I would laugh just by hearing you. I sure do wish I could hear you laugh now. I miss that so much!
You always loved movies. From the time you were little, you always loved sitting down with the family and enjoying a good movie. As you got older you became a fan of many actors and they were all comedians. You loved Jim Carrey, Jack Black, Steve Carell, etc. Like I said, you loved to laugh! I can remember about 4 years ago when we were introduced to the Napoleon Dynamite movie. You laughed so hard during that movie. We finally had to buy one. I can't recall how many times we've watched it and I will admit, we've all laughed at the silliness in that movie. What was even funnier was when you would talk and act like Napoleon Dynamite. You were so good at it. You could have been a stand in for him in the movie. That's how good you were. You looked and sounded just like him when you did your acting. You made us laugh so many times over that.
You also enjoyed your action packed movies. You, Caleb and your dad have watched so many war movies and super hero movies.
Music is another thing you loved. You always had some type of music playing in your room. There were many times when you would have your music playing in your room and we would all be in the other room with the TV going. We would have to tell you to please go turn your music off so that we could hear whatever else was on. You love all types of music. What amazed me was that you even loved the older music like the 80's music. That was probably some of your favorite music. You asked for some of the older CD's when you were about 13 & 14 yrs. old. What other young teenager does that? Maybe there are some. I just know when I was a kid, I wasn't interested in my parents music. I wanted to listen to the current music. I appreciated that you enjoyed listening to music that your parents grew up listening to.
You also enjoyed playing the keyboard. You took some lessons for a while and you learned it fairly quickly. We were hoping to get you signed up for more lessons because we knew you were talented at it. A few months ago, we were at the church in the youth suite. I was talking to some friends and heard someone playing the drums. I looked up and it was you. I remember saying "where did he learn to do that?" I had no idea you could play a beat. Then I found out that you had gone on YouTube and learned how to play some. That's when you let us know that you were interested in learning to play the drums. Your Dad and I were all for it. If you can go online and learn something that quickly and easily then we wanted you to have a drum set and play. You and Caleb are both very talented when it comes to music. I'm so happy about that because I never was.
For a few years when we lived in Wake Forest, you played Upward Basketball. You loved it. You were so disappointed when you got too old to play for Upward. So, last year, when Corben played Upward for the first time, you were so excited. You took pictures of him playing and you just really loved being there and watching his games. You helped teach Corben some things about the game and you would practice with him. I know that Corben will always remember that and I'm so thankful ya'll had the love of basketball in common.
Photography was a passion of yours. You had a digital camera and you were always looking for something to take a picture of. You were always hoping to take that "perfect picture". You took over my video camera which was fine with me. You knew how to work it better that I did. You made your own videos and movies all the time. You would use your friends and siblings as your actors. You would video and then edit it and come up with a great movie. I'm so thankful today to have those videos and movies to look back on.
There are so many great things I remember about you. You were so quiet, generous, kind, loving, etc. I could go on and on. From a young age, your Dad taught you and Caleb to hold the door open for me. He wanted to teach you to be a gentlemen and hold the door open for people, especially a woman. He taught ya'll well because you learned it and you lived it. If you were ever in front of me, you would hold the door. You would hold it for other people as well. Ya'll would even notice when other men wouldn't hold it for women and you would tell us about what you saw. You couldn't believe that they would be so rude. You were always respectful to adults. You always knew when you needed to be on your best behavior.
There are so many things that I think of that bring a smile to my face. You never were a fan of just a plain 'ol brownie. You liked them with powdered sugar sprinkled on top. You called them "flower bunnies". You started calling them that when you were a lot younger and it just stuck. I have no idea why you called them that. The brownies didn't look anything like a bunny. So, I had a Pampered Chef shaker that usually has powdered sugar in it so that you could shake it on brownies when you had them. The other day I was getting something off of the shelf and I saw that shaker. It has powdered sugar in it. I just started crying. You recently had eaten a "flower bunny" and I knew you were the last one to use that shaker.
You loved chocolate milk. You made some every morning and every night. You had your own way of making it that I'll always remember. You were loud when you stirred the syrup into the milk. We knew when you were the one in the kitchen making milk. You were also a smacker when you ate. Normally, that is rude and people don't like it. It never really bothered me. It didn't bother me because my Papa (your great grandpa) did that. Every time you ate, I would think of him. Papa was also loud when he made his drinks. When he added sugar to his coffee, he would stir for the longest time and clang the spoon from side to side of the cup. I believe you had a lot of Papa Thompson in you. Now, the 2 of you are together in Heaven.
When you went to bed, your bed had to be perfect. The covers had to be neat and straight. They were barely messed up when you woke up in the morning. For the most part, your room was always in order too. You didn't like clutter and chaos. It's so funny because you and Caleb are so different in those areas. Caleb doesn't have to have the bed with perfectly neat covers and his room is usually chaos. Ya'll are both so different. That's why ya'll were so perfect for each other.
You also loved playing the video games and you were good at them. You were usually the one to ask for a new game for your birthday or Christmas. You actually got one this year for your birthday and beat the game in just a few days. I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for that. It doesn't bother me that you loved playing the games so much because I knew that you also loved reading and you always got your school work done. You actually enjoyed school. You had recently finished one of your subjects. It was a science elective that was short. You brought it to me and told me you had finished it. You also said that you wanted me to get you a different subject to work on. Even though that was an elective and you finished it, you wanted to do more. I was amazed by that!
When you and Caleb were little and were asked a question, ya'll would answer it differently than most people. If it was a question that would usually get a "uh-huh" answer, ya'll wouldn't say that. You would say "yes-huh" and "no-huh". It was just recently that a question was asked and you answered "yes-huh". I just laughed. Even at 16, you would still answer like that and I loved it.
One of the things that makes losing you so hard is the fact that you were so talented in so many things as well as smart. I believe you could have been anything that you wanted to be. You could have been a musician, a photographer, a movie director, a doctor, etc. The list could go on. I hate that we'll never know.
I want you to know that I'll always remember these things about you. And, there are many more memories that will come to mind and I'll continue to write them down. I want to make sure I never forget them. I also want to share them with Corben & Carlie one day. They are so young that they will forget some stuff. I don't want them to forget if I can help it. I want Caleb, Corben & Carlie to always remember their big brother and what a fun, great big brother he was.
Chandler, I love you with my whole heart. I always will. I am so blessed to be your mom.
I miss you and love you so much,
Your proud Mama
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