Over the past few days, I've continued to read and come across things I want to have easy access to. The following quotes and scriptures are things that have spoken to me.
So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. -Isaiah 41:10, NIV
The eternal God is your refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms. -Deuteronomy 33:27 NKJV
"Because he loves me," says the Lord, "I will rescue him; I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name. He will call upon me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble, I will deliver him and honor him." -Psalm 91:14-15, NIV
No one moves from despair to emotional recovery in a straight line - no matter what level of grief we're dealing with. Grief comes in waves. Just about the time we take a deep breath and say, "OK, I can get through this, " we get hit again. -Sandra Aldrich, Living Through the Loss of Someone You Love
I am he who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you. -Isaiah 46:4, NIV
True hope changes sorrow, but does not obliterate it. -Edith Schaeffer, Affliction
Friends, when life gets really difficult, don't jump to the conclusion that God isn't on the job. Instead, be glad that you are in the very thick of what Christ experienced. This is a spiritual refining process, with glory just around the corner. -1 Peter 4:12-13, The Message
Hope does not lie solely in anticipating that God will give us a wonderful future and resolve all things to our good. Rather, hope lies in knowing that God is with us in the here and now, and He will impart His love and grace to us to enable us to go from minute to minute, hour to hour, day to day. -Charles Stanley, The Reason for My Hope
This is so true for me. I can only get through each day by God's grace and love. I literally go through the day minute by minute, hour to hour and day to day. Chad will often ask me a question about something taking place in the future. Or, he wants to plan something for the future, like a vacation. It is so hard for me to answer him. I usually don't have an answer because it's hard for my mind to get past the moment that I'm in. I haven't even been able to plan a week's worth of meals and do a big grocery shopping run yet. It's hard to sit down and get my brain to do that kind of stuff.
Suffering teaches us the absolute limits to our abilities. -Anonymous
I have found that the human spirit can withstand almost any tragedy, if we can make sense of it or at least believe that God is in control. We. . . .know that no interruption (in life), be it tragic or delightful, is greater than our God. He can bring hope into inexplicable loss. -M. Craig Barnes, When God Interrupts
I haven't been able to make any sense out of what has happened. I have no idea why Chandler had to die. It just seems so wrong to me. But, like the quote above says, I am believing that God is in control. I'm holding onto the hope that I have in Him.
God says that the more hopeless your circumstances, the more likely your salvation. The greater your cares, the more genuine your prayers. The darker the room, the greater the need for light. . . .God's help is near and always available, but it is only given to those who seek it. -Max Lucado, He Still Moves Stones
You may have to go through deep waters, but the good news is that you will go through them. . . .The outcome is certain. God will win, and because He wins and you are in Him, you will win too. -Charles Stanley, The Reason for My Hope
Other men see only a hopeless end, but the Christian rejoices in an endless hope. -Gilbert Beenken
Those who hope in me will not be disappointed. -Isaiah 49:23, NIV
Pain. We all know what it tastes like. Whether its source is physical, emotional, mental, or spiritual, its interruption in our lives disrupts and reshapes. It intercepts our hopes and plans; it rearranges our dreams. It always leaves a mark. -Tim Hansel, You Gotta Keep Dancin'
My life is but a weaving betwixt my God and me:
I do not choose the colors He worketh steadily.
Sometimes He weaveth sorrow, and I in foolish pride
Forget He sees the upper and I the underside.
Not till the loom is silent and the shuttles cease to fly
Will God unfold the pattern and explain the reason why.
For the dark threads are as needful in the
Weaver's skillful hand
As the threads of gold and silver in the pattern He has planned. -Grant Tuller
No one ever told me about the laziness of grief. Except at my job - where the machine seems to run on much as usual - I loathe the slightest effort. Not only writing but even reading is too much. Even shaving. What does it matter now whether my cheek is rough or smooth? -C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed
The eyes of the Lord search the whole earth in order to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him. -2 Corinthians 16:9, NLT
No matter how weak our faith may seem, when it is anchored to the unfailing promises of God's Word, we can withstand the strongest buffeting and the most difficult suffering. -John E. MacArthur, The Power of Suffering
Sometimes the Lord calms the storm. Sometimes He lets the storm rage and calms His child. -Anonymous
There is no agonizing by God, no hoping He has made the right decision, no wondering what is really best for us. God makes no mistakes. -Jerry Bridges, Trusting God
Be still, my soul!
the hour is hastening on
When we shall be
forever with the Lord,
When disappointment, grief, and fear are gone,
Sorrow forgot, love's purest joys restored.
Be still, my soul!
when change and tears are past,
All safe and blessed
we stall meet at last.
-Katharina von Schlegel, "Be Still, My Soul"
Suffering makes us want to go there (heaven). Broken homes and broken hearts crush our illusions that earth can keep its promises, that it can really satisfy. Only the hope of heaven can truly move our passions off this world. . .and place them where they will find their glorious fulfillment. Suffering hurries the heart homeward.
-Joni Eareckson Tada, Heaven, Your Real Home
I just have one work to say about the above quote, "A-men"!
How could things go on when the world has come to an end? How could I go on in this void? How could one person, not very big, leave an emptiness that was galaxy-wide? -Sheldon Vanauken, A Severe Mercy
This is one of the hardest things I have to deal with. It's so hard to go on with life when I feel like my world has come to an end. I have such a huge void. A huge part of me is gone forever. When Chandler left, he took a lot of me with him and I can never get that back. How do I learn to go on when I'm missing part of me? There is a huge emptiness without Chandler.
Turn to me and be gracious to me,
for I am lonely and afflicted.
The troubles of my heart have multiplied;
free me from my anguish.
Look up my affliction and my distress.
-Psalm 25:16-18, NIV
The righteous cry out, and the Lord hears, and delivers them out of all their troubles. The Lord is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves such as have a contrite spirit. -Psalm 34:17-18, NKJ
What matters most is not knowing what we are, what we do, or what we feel; it is becoming acquainted with God, getting to know what He is and what He feels. Comfort and peace can never come from anything we know about ourselves but only and always from what we know about God. -Hannah Whitall Smith, God of All Comfort
Jesus did not come to explain away suffering or remove it. He came to fill it with his Presence. -Paul Claudel
At last when life is over
With Him I shall abide;
Then I shall view the pattern
Upon the other side.
Then I shall know the reason
Why pain with joy entwined
Was woven in the fabric
Of a life that God designed. -Anonymous
God has not been trying an experiment on my faith or love in order to find out their quality. He knew it already. It was I who didn't. -C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed
A few days after my husband's fatal automobile accident, I was talking with the Lord. And I asked God, not angrily, but expectantly, "Well, God, what are you going to do with this one? How are you going to use it for your glory?" -JoNancy Sundberg
I struggle with this one personally. I've been told that God will use the loss of Chandler for His glory. Chandler was an inspiration when he was alive and people say he still is in death. That's all great. But, honestly, I don't like that God is using Chandler or our family in this way. I would rather have Chandler back here with us. Yes, it would be wonderful to see others come to Christ through this. But, the selfish part of me and the mom in me just doesn't care. I'll just be so glad when the day comes that I can see God personally and understand why He did this. Maybe then I can say "Well, Praise the Lord!, You did a great job there". But, right now, I can't say that.
I had to take Caleb somewhere a while ago. While I was driving back home, I was thinking. It seems that when I get behind the wheel, my brain seems to work overtime. I started thinking about Chandler and continuing to wonder why this has happened. How is God going to use this? God can do whatever he wants to glorify Himself and bring others to Him. Why does He have to use children as part of His plan, especially if it involves the death of a child? Aren't there other ways He can do His business? I just couldn't stop asking those questions. Maybe I shouldn't be questioning God so much. I mean, it's probably not my business to know these answers right now. But, I have to talk to God about it anyway. I can't just pretend I don't think these things. I mean, He knows my thoughts anyway. It just feels better for me to get the questions out there.
God's ultimate purpose in all suffering is joy. Scripture is full of songs of praise that came out of great trials. -Elisabeth Elliott, A Path Through Suffering
We are uncertain of the next step, but we are certain of God. As soon as we abandon ourselves to God and do the task He has placed closest to us, He begins to fill our lives with surprises. . . .Leave everything to Him and it will be gloriously and graciously uncertain how He will come in - but you can be certain that He will come. -Oswald Chambers, My Utmost for His Highest
You are a work in progress, God is molding and fashioning you into a person with whom He wants to live forever. -Charles Stanley, The Reason for My Hope
But I have raised you up for this very purpose, that I might show you my power and that my name might be proclaimed in all the earth. -Exodus 9:16, NIV
Let us go right into the presence of God, with true hearts fully trusting him. -Hebrews 10:22, NLT
The scriptures and quotes here are all good. I can relate to them. I can't say that I believe all of them yet, but hopefully, I will get there as I continue to go through the grieving process. I'm just thankful I have these things to go back to, to read and try and find some kind of encouragement and hope.
I am praying for you Amie.
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